OOooooo please post some of the fails! That thread had me in stitches but I don't have the setup to make my own card joke generator
Well, my first training set was a failure, and the network itself wasn't configured right either, so even after a lot of runs it produced some hilariously non-Magic cards.
Skullane Justaius 

Instant
Prevent all combat damage to each creature your opponents control until end of turn.
1/1
Sarpacive Lold 




Legendary Creature - Centaur Warrior
Bloodthirst 1
Sarpacive Lold can't be blocked by Sarpacive Lold.
2/2
Nethon Untaller 

Creature - Horror
Trample, until end of turn. It's still a land.
1/1
Sorry Savaceration 
Instant
Return target card from your graveyard to the battlefield.
The second run was much better
Paragon of the Pain 

Sorcery
Paragon of the Pain deals 2 damage to target creature or player.
Shell Seet 
Artifact Creature - Construct
When Shell Seet enters the battlefield, draw a card.
2/2
Sage-Tinger Spirit 

Creature - Dryad Shaman


,

: Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
2/2
Bane Boar Invoker 

Creature - Human Shaman
When Bane Boar Invoker enters the battlefield, draw a card.
2/2
Not that it didn't produce some absurd cards...
Chronaster Mage 

Creature - Human Wizard
Flash
If a source would deal damage to you, that player exiles the top card of his or her library. If it's a creature card, put it onto the battlefield. Then shuffle your library.
1/1
#This is actually a pretty sick idea for a card, apart from the wonky templating!
Blood Brink 


Instant
Look at the top three cards of your library. Put all cards in your graveyard onto the battlefield. Then shuffle your library.
#I actually like the harmless "look at the top X cards of your library" rider, except that it is prone to cheating in a tournament setting of course.
Sage's Reflexer 
Artifact

,

: Draw a card for each creature you control.
#What could go wrong?
Scale of Untaid 


Instant
Put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control.
#Interesting card at the right converted mana cost probably, but definitely in the wrong color
Talisman of Warding 


Enchantment
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may return target creature to its owner's hand.
#Ooooh... That's where the green mana went for Scale of the Untaid!
And then there's always near complete gibberish like this:
Death Wild 
Artifact

: Add

to your mana pool.

,

, Sacrifice Battle of Statue enters the battlefield tapped.

: Add

or

to your mana pool.

,

: You may play the exiled card to the battlefield.
#Yeah. It starts out decent enough, and then trails off into oblivion.
And now for some wild cards!
Chillring Many 

Enchantment - Aura
Enchant creature


: Put Chillring Many and target creature and untap all draft cards at random.
#Woooooo! All draft cards!
Blood Cantor 


Legendary Creature - Orc Warrior

: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
6/6
#It's legendary, it'll be fiiiiine!
Predator's Shadows 

Sorcery
Buyback

Flying
Constelsaty target Shave controller of the chosen player.
Equip

#Ehm... Right.
Slizd-Shifper Mampervit 

Creature - Horror
Painswing
When Slizd-Shifper Mampervit enters the battlefield, exile all cards from his or her graveyard.
2/2
#Oh shit, that name sure sounds like it's a horror. And what the heck is "Painswing"? The inverse of lifelink?
Noma Weist 

Enchantment
At the beginning of your end step, Noma Weist gets +1/+3 until end of turn. It's still a land and lose the game.
Enchanted creature gets -2/-2.
#Giggles.
Savage Cleruster 
Artifact Creature - Dragon
Flying
Whenever another creature you control dies, it deals 5 damage to that player.
3/3
#Wait. What player? My opponent? That's savage indeed! Me!?! That's... Also pretty savage I guess...
Skelgand Megron 

Creature - Sphinx
Morph



2/2
#Always curve out beautifully with this mediocre sphinx!
Necropone 
Creature - Elemental Scarecrow
Whenever an opponent discards a creature spell, remove a -1/-1 counter from Necropone.
1/1
#A
lot has to go right for that triggered ability to matter
Gubling Lightnar 

Creature - Human Shaman
Whenever you cast you sacrifice permanents.
2/1
#YOU UNDERSTAND! YOU DO THAT NOW!
Mirror 


Creature - Elemental
Defline
Mirror attacks each turn if able.
Whenever a creature dies, you may have more spells.
#I want more spells yes please! I also want power and toughness
